When they reached the castle, they had to skirt past more fighting men in the courtyard. The two women slinked through a large pair of wooden doors into an enormous room. There were people talking loudly and running everywhere. It sounded like they were looking for someone. Agatha stuck to the wall and led the way to a staircase. After several twists and turns, they ducked into a bedroom and closed the door behind them. The furniture was large and adorned with ornate scroll work. It looked like someone important slept there.
“Whose room is this?” she asked, not for a second thinking it was Agatha’s.
“Does it matter? We’re safe for now.” The old woman went over to an upright bureau and began rummaging through it. Naomi leaned against the wall. She hoped someone would show up soon to help them. She couldn’t wait to get back home.
“Here put this on.” Agatha took the sword and pushed a gown into her hands.
She took at it in befuddlement. “Why?”
“For a disguise! You need to look like one of us.”
She nodded thinking it sounded like a good idea. She did stick out in her jeans and sweatshirt. She quickly stripped off her clothes and threw on the gown.
“How do I look?”
Agatha nodded with approval. “Like a lady.”
“Is that good?”
There was pounding at the door. Naomi jumped and looked at it in trepidation. “Where’s the sword?”
“You won’t need it.”
“What should we say to them?”
“No, ack, don’t, let go! That sort of thing.”
“What?”
Before she could demand further explanation, the door burst open, and a group of men with swords streamed in. One turned back and shouted into the corridor, “Alert the others, we’ve found her!”
“Found who? Wait! What’s going on?” They grabbed her by both arms and began to drag her from the room. The men pushed Agatha back.
“Don’t fear, Lady Naomi. Everything will be all right!”
“What? Agatha!”
The men hauled Naomi out. She kicked, and yelled, but the men wouldn't let her go. She only knew one thing. Agatha had set her up. That just went to show, never trust crazy old women. They’ll give you up to medieval throwbacks every time
The men took her back into the large hall where now there were more men, but thankfully no fighting. The men hauling her muscled their way through the others until they reached the dais at the end of the hall.
One man broke off and stepped forward. He knelt on one knee and announced, “Sir, we’ve secured the Lord’s lady. The castle is yours.”
She looked up at the dais to see who the soldier was talking to and gaped. The man that stood above her had on some sort of full-head mask. The mask was made of a dark metal and shaped like a demonic skull. It had a perpetual ghastly smile. Like Skeletor but scary. The eyes holes were black and empty. He had on full armor which had wet splashes of red still on it. In one hand, he gripped a massive sword. It dripped red too. All he needed was a severed head in his other hand to complete the picture. When he turned toward her, she felt the weight of his gaze like a shroud. She hoped her head wasn't supposed to complete the picture.
She gulped and said, “I really think there’s been a mistake.”
Continue to Chapter 2, part 1
Chapter 1, part 4
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9 comments:
I wish the chapters were longer ...
I'm looking forward to reading more!
Thanks, anon! It's funny you said that about chapter lengths. I purposely made them short because the popular opinion concerning writing on the net is that shorter is better. But that doesn't mean the popular opinion is right.
It's something I will have to consider more before making a final decision, but for now, UB has been broken into roughly 4-page chapters. Scary Mary has much longer chapters. I don't know if people prefer SM's chapter lengths to UB's or not. I'd be interested in hearing more opinions.
Anyway, thanks for reading, and I hope to hear more of your thoughts.
"Like Skeletor, but scary."
I lol'd. Personally, I like these short chapters. Tiny attention span have I, no matter how amusing the text I'm reading. I really enjoy this story -- 'tis a refreshing break from all the fantasy serials that take themselves far too seriously.
Keep up the good work, eh!
I'm going to echo Ms. Richards, I like the short chapter lengths - you get just enough before going to the next, and it lets your eyes take a break while the next page loads/you think of a comment etc.
It's all about finding a happy medium I suppose. I think I've found it now. Hard to say.
i dunno, i think i prefer longer chapters. makes us think of good reviews. :) and there's less chance of something going wrong and not being able to read the next chapter. i also noticed that you didn't name the chapters anymore (maybe because they're so many?), i was kinda sad about that. for me, it makes the chapter more interesting to read :)
Yeah, I decided not to name the chapters. Coming up with chapter titles is hard.
I like short chapters better. If there are long chapters, particularly in fantasy, it drags and short chapters means each chapter has to have its own excitement.
Anon, thanks for your input. I find the whole thing tough to decide. UB wasn't originally written without chapter breaks, but I know chapters are good. I appreciate them in a book. Just need to get used to using them myself.
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